~This Type Love~

"I want a love like me thinking of you thinking of me thinking of you TYPE LOVE or me telling my friends more than I've ever admitted to myself about how I feel about you TYPE LOVE or hating how jealous you are but loving how much you want me all to yourself TYPE LOVE. Or seeing how your first name just sounds so good next to my last name.

And shit-

I wanted to see how far I could get without calling you and I barely made it out of my garage.

See, I want a love that makes me wait until she falls asleep then wonder if she's dreaming about us being in love TYPE LOVE or who loves the other more or what she's doing at this exact moment or slow dancing in the middle of our apartment to the music of our hearts.
Closing my eyes and imagining how a love so good could just hurt so much when she's not there and shit, I love not knowing where this love is headed TYPE LOVE.

And check this-

I wanna place those little post-it notes all around the house so she never forgets how much I love her TYPE LOVE,
Then not have enough ink in my pen to write all the love TYPE LOVE and hope I make her feel as good as she makes me feel.
And I wanna deal with my friends making fun of me the way I made fun of them when they went through the same kind of love TYPE LOVE.

The only difference is this is one of those real love TYPE LOVES.

And just like in high school I wanna spend hours on the phone not saying shit and then fall asleep and then wake up with her right next to me and smell her all up in my covers TYPE LOVE.
And I wanna try counting the ways I love her then lose count in the middle just so I could start all over again.

And I wanna celebrate one of those one-month anniversaries even though they ain't really anniversaries but doing it just 'cause it makes her happy TYPE LOVE.

And check this-

I wanna fall in love with the melody the phone plays when our numbers dial in TYPE LOVE and talk to you until I lose my breath, she leaves me breathless, but with the expanding of my lungs I inhale all of her back into me.

I want a love that makes me need to change my cell phone calling plan to something that allows me to talk to her longer 'cause in all honesty, I want to avoid one of them high cell phone bill TYPE LOVES.
And I don't want a love that makes me regret how small my hands are. I mean the lines on my palms don't give me enough time to love you as long as I'd like to TYPE LOVE.
And I want a love that makes me st-st-st-stutter just thinking about how strong this love is TYPE LOVE and I want a love that makes me want to cut off all my hair. Well maybe not all of the hair, maybe like I'd cut the split ends and trim my mustache but it would still be a symbol of how strong my love is for her.

I kind of feel comfortable now so I even be fantasize about walking out on a green light just dying to get hit by a car just so I could lose my memory, get transported to some third world country just to get treated and somehow meet up again with you so I could fall in love with you in a different language and see if it still feels the same TYPE LOVE.

I want a love that's as unexplainable as she is.

-Saul Williams, This type love.
def poetry jam.

~Si Volvieras A Mi~

Como sobrevivir?
como calmar mi sed?
como seguir sin ti?
como saltar sin red?


Con ese adios tan salvaje y cruel
me deshojaste la piel
la eternidad en final se quedo
y un desierto es ...mi corazon...


Ay si volvieras a mi
encenderia el sol mil primaveras
si regresaras por mi
seria un milagro cada beso que me dieras
pero hoy te vas
y no hay vuelta atras.


Que habra despues de ti?
mas que estas lagrimas
si hasta la lluvia en el jardin
toca una musica sin fin...
sombria y tragica...


Hoy de rodillas le pido a Dios
que por el bien de los dos
algo en tu pecho se quiebre al oir
a este loco que se muere de amor...


y desataste un huracan
fuego y furia de un volcan
que no se apagar...
como olvido que fui
esclavo de ti¦ya no puedo mas...


Aaaaaaaaaay -- si volvieras a mi vida, si volvieras
si regresaras por mi
seria feliz otra vez
pero hoy te vas
y no hay vuelta atras.

~Take the damn stick already~

I give up! Finally! I don't want to, but there is nothing else I can do! You win, you can have the damn stick! I wish you would just take it and leave!

~Alejate~

Jamas senti en el alma tanto amor
Y nadie mas que tu, me amo
Por ti rei y llore, renaci tambien

Lo que tuve di, por tenerte aqui
Ya se que despedirnos es mejor
Sufriendo pagare mi error
Ya nada sera igual, lo tengo que aceptar
Ya hallar la fuerza en mi para este adios

Alejate, no puedo mas
Ya no hay manera de volver el tiempo atras
Olvidate de mi
Y dejame seguir a solas con mi soledad
Alejate, ya dime adios
Y me resignare a seguir sin tu calor
Y jamas entedere que fue lo que paso
Si nada puedo hacer, alejate

No voy a arrepentirme del ayer
Amandote y se, mujer
Por el amor aquel, por serte siempre fiel
Hoy tengo que ser fuerte y aprender

Alejate, no puedo mas
Ya no hay manera de volver el tiempo atras
Olvidate de mi
Y dejame seguir a solas con mi soledad
Alejate, ya dime adios
Y me resignara seguir sin tu calor
Y jamas entedere que fue lo que paso
Si nada puedo hacer, alejate

Alejate, no puedo mas
Ya no hay manera de volver el tiempo atras
Olvidate de mi
Y dejame seguir a solas con mi soledad
Alejate, ya dime adios
Y me resignara seguir sin tu calor
Y jamas entedere que fue lo que paso
Si nada puedo hacer, alejate

~Home To Stay~

I know you're gone
I watched you leave
I always thought
That it was me
You made it clear
With that last kiss
You couldn't live a life
With maybe's and whatif's

When every boat
Has sailed away
And every path
Is marked and paved
When every road
Has had its say
Then I'll be bringing you back
Home to stay

I have the cards you sent to me
You wrote of trains and Paris galleries
This spring you'll draw
Canals, and frescoed walls
Look how far your dreaming's gone

When every town looks just the same
When every choice gets hard to make
When every map is put away
Then I'll be bringing you back
Home to stay

And now I know why you had to go alone
Isn't there a place between

When every boat
Has sailed away
And every path
Is marked and paved

When every road
Has had its say
Then I'll be bringing you back
Home to stay

Reach out to me
Call out my name
And I would bring you back again
Today

~Overwhelming~

Overwhelming passion and lust overcome my reservations and innocence; the world no longer exists. No thoughts of sweet commitment or of any repentance.

~Danielle ~ October 2004

~Late night thoughts, day time words~

Life sure does have a way of throwing you for a loop at times. One minute you think you have it all figured out then ‘BAM’, you really don’t know the people you surround yourself with daily. It amazes me how people can claim to be someone they are not for so long, without breaking a sweat. It’s as though they truly convince themselves that they are this person who they claim to be and hide behind that shroud. That is the only explanation that I can come up with in this context. Oh, I have faith in the goodness of people, but I doubt most loyalty. Selfishness seems to have taken over the minds and hearts of so many people. I can’t explain to you about all of the betrayal I have witnessed in such a short time. Good friends betraying friends, infidelity, and disrespect. It is enough to lead one to some seriously negative thoughts or actions. Betrayal by the ones who claim to love you the most, without the opportunity of avoidance, can really tear at a person if they let it. I find myself at a loss for words a lot more nowadays. The things that people will do to others amaze the hell out of me. I’m not only talking of the things that I have gone through myself, but of what I have seen the people I love go through. It’s been a crazy ride, amusing at times… The best part is the individuals who think they are home free and safe behind the idea that their secret is secured and locked away… All I have to say to you is keep on thinking you got away with it, it’s ok…Live in your world of denial. You are who you are, and no amount of tears nor anger from either side is going to change that fact. That is one thing I can say that I have learned. The selfish ones will have their brief moments of bliss as they do what they please without regards to those who care for them… But it is they who will find themselves one day without that love and companionship once the gig is up and their friends and companions get tired of dealing with it. There is only so much forgiveness one can give. Once it is over it is over, and those who disregard others will find themselves exactly where they were running from, that loneliness that they are so scared of… Karma is a mutha and even the slickest of them eventually slip and fall in their own deep pools of disloyalty. I am not the one to judge so I won’t. To those who are getting fed up with the bull, all I can say is do what you gotta do, remove yourself from the situation and let them on their own merry little way...they will get theirs one day...all we can do is filter out those who are not good for us and appreciate those who truly deserve our love and respect…. And to those who are putting up a front, I don’t understand how you think, and I almost don’t want to. If it is worth it to you, then there is nothing anyone can say to make you realize what you did or are doing is wrong. Just keep in mind that what goes around comes back around and I can promise that the grass is not always greener on the other side and you may wake one day in deep regret and you won't be able to change it back. You made the bed, and whether it be sooner or later, you will lay in it.